Parter with weight issues
Hi Heather, I work daily on eating healthy and exercising to a varying degree of success. My husband is very overweight and does not attempt to watch calories. How can i deal with the resentment i have towards him for not caring about his body or health. I have gotten to the point where he buys oreos and little debbies and i am not tempted to eat them so the food in the house is not the problem. I want him to be healthy but i also do not want to shame him into eating healthy because that will cause his own resentment towards me. I know from my past, i had to be in the right headspace to attempt weight loss. If anyone would have said anything to me about my weight it would just cause shame and embarrassment. Are there any tips on working with an overweight partner to get motivated. Thank you, Karen
Bizarre snacking
Sorry, my last entry was accidentally sent. I'll try again. I'm 61 years old, 5'6", and currently weigh between 152-154 pounds. I like to maintain my weight around 144-148 pounds and I've been able to do that for the last twenty years by eating a healthy diet: plenty of protein and good fats as well as quality carbs and occasional treats. In the last couple of months, however, I've begun snacking every day between 3 and 6. Even if I plan a snack and sit down to eat it I still find myself in the kitchen looking for more. I don't think I binge, but I eat a lot of little bites. I might eat a dozen different things: a couple of almonds, a tiny scoop of Nutella, a date, a spoonful of granola, a stick of celery, a bite of carrot, some sweet pepper, a mouthful of yogurt, a bite of rice pudding, a single chocolate, a spoonful of maple syrup, a 1/4 of a banana...you get the idea. There's a voice in my head asking "What are you doing?" But I ignore it. I feel compelled to eat. Part of me knows I'm being ridiculous; I don't need all that food and I'm spoiling my appetite for dinner which my husband and I usually eat around 6:45 - 7 o'clock. I always take fairly small portions at dinner but I am still gaining weight. The thing is, I care and yet I don't care; that's what confuses me. When I'm in the kitchen sampling everything I'm having fun. I tell myself I'm in control because I don't eat a lot of any one thing no matter how delicious it might be. But once the urge to eat has passed I wonder at myself. What was I doing? I can feel my clothes getting tighter and I don't like it. I feel afraid. I was 188 pounds when I was 18 and I found it very uncomfortable. I lost that weight and the heaviest I've been since was when I was in my mid-40s and I got up to 162 pounds. I gave up wine and the weight fell off. Since then, as I said, I've managed to maintain my weight between 144 and 148 pounds. I don't know what's got into me or how you might be able to help me, but I am writing because I'm always impressed with your insights into your listeners' situations and I hope you might be able to give me some direction. Each day, I tell myself tomorrow I'll behave myself, have a reasonable snack, and go for a walk or do some yoga or read a book between 3 and 6, but the next day when 3 o'clock rolls around I'm right back at it, browsing the kitchen and snick-snacking for a half hour or so. Thanks, in advance, for your help. And thanks for your super podcast. another Heather
Short-term low-calorie diet followed by maintenance phase
Hello Heather! I think I know what you're going to say about this. But it comes from a reputable source. Which shocks me! University of Michigan has an obesity research program that has released some very sensible findings over the years. Their attached health clinic has a medical weight loss/maintenance program that kicks off with 12 weeks eating a low calorie (1000-1200) to very low calorie (800) diet. The food is 4-5 "Optifast" shakes a day and 1 Optifast soup. On average, participants drop 15% of their body weight in this first 12 weeks. Then there's a transition phase followed by a customized maintenance meal plan that uses real food. I thought this approach to weight loss was debunked years ago in favor of the slow and steady approach. But...scientists! Research! Do they know something I am missing? Here's a link to their program, if you want to see it. Thanks!! https://med.umich.edu/pdf/weight-management/WMP-orientation-updated.pdf
Maintenance Journey Q
Dear Heather, I’ve been a fan of your podcast for years! I finally took the plunge today and became a premium subscriber. Thank you for all that you do. In 2017, I lost 100 pounds over 14 months. Then, I immediately got pregnant with my second child and quickly gained 70 pounds back. I do my best to focus on the fact that I have successfully maintained a 30 pound weight loss over the last seven years instead of beating myself up over the 70 pound gain. However, I would like to get back to 140-150 pound weight range and stay there forever. However, I feel the 1,000 calories a day deficit I did eight years ago to lose the weight is too extreme for me as I turn 40 years old this year. And I’ve been giving your perspective on embracing the maintenance journey a lot of thought this month. I know slow and steady wins the race and I need to give this journey all the time it needs. With all that said, I have an idea I’d like to run by you. If I set my Fitbit “current weight” to 140 lbs (140 is my goal weight— I am currently 210), and tell my app I want to “maintain” my weight so the app sets caloric needs for my future 140 pound self, theoretically, I shouldn’t have to change anything about my caloric intake habits once I hit my goal weight because I will have been eating within that caloric range throughout the whole weight loss period. Does that logic hold up? Or am I missing something? I will also mention that I understand the importance of never eating under 1200 calories a day and since I walk a minimum of 10,000 steps a day, my FitBit would never suggest I eat that little at maintenance calories for a 5’6” 140 pound person. Thank you for your insight! With gratitude, Megan