Ask Me Anything

with Half Size Me

Ask a question

Sorry it’s long

I have a really big problem and I really need some help. I cannot believe this just happened. I hit my goal Saturday, June 25. My ultimate number that I wanted to weigh I finally hit it. I have been on this program for one year exactly and I made my goal. Now I have to learn maintenance something that I have never learned in the past. I gain weight very fast And I am an either or person. I am either on or off. Nothing in between but I have got to learn maintenance. I am going to be 60 in August and I’ve been overweight all my life and my health has really been affected by it so I cannot gain this weight back. I have an addictive personality. I am a binge eater and I am a big time foodaholic. (All under control this past year) I want to lose five more pounds to be 5 pounds below my goal so that way when I start to eat a little bit more calories if I gain a pound or two or 5, I won’t freak out because I’m above my goal. I gain extremely fast I should be in a Guinness book of world records. Back in 2013 I hit my goal I had lost a total of 179 pounds and I gained back over 100 within a few months., So I am very scared. For the past year there are four or five restaurants that I can go to and I know how to work it into my program. For example Texas roadhouse the calories are online so I am able to find what I can eat. This is what I cannot believe happened. My boyfriend said to me tonight “so now that you’ve reached your goal what are you planning on doing? “ I told him I wanted to lose five more pounds and explained why. “He said I knew it. I knew you wouldn’t be satisfied. I’m getting really tired of just going to a few restaurants I wanna start going to other restaurants.” I told him if I can work it in we can go but if I can’t then I can’t. For lack of a better word, there’s a certain Ma Pa steakhouse which naturally doesn’t have the calorie count any place. He said a “steak is a steak”. And I said no Texas roadhouse I get a 5 ounce sirloin. This place their steak is huge and I know for a fact they marinate it in butter. Plus other things. He said “you can cut the steak in half we can split it.” I understand what he is saying and I do carry a little scale with me so I could weigh my portion. ( I know I’m nuts lol) But I would not know how much I would have to add to it for the other stuff they put on there. He says “well then you might as well just curl up and die if you can’t live and go any place else. What’s the use of living & being miserable.” I went out the other night and got a couple pieces of pizza and a salad and I enjoyed it. Was not miserable. He said “you are always hungry” . Well yes I am but that’s just me. I just hit my goal two days ago I don’t wanna start going to other places that I’m not sure how to count am I wrong in this? Oh my goodness now that I’m at goal, people think I need to start eating again because they think I’m too thin. It’s all relative. Naturally at my weight now I look thinner than I did at my heaviest I was 314 pounds. 200 pounds looks better than 314. I don’t understand people. They’re not happy when you’re heavy they make fun of you. Then you lose weight and they still make comments. Normally if something in the past went down like it did tonight , I would just be like screw it, I’m going to eat and I’m gonna show you. Who have I shown though in the past, only me. Being as heavy as I was gaining and losing gaining and losing. My Health being in jeopardy with my sugar being very high. High blood pressure, a bunch of other things. Now my numbers are good. I do not know how to do maintenance. I do not know what to do next. But I do know I do not want to gain this weight back. For the past seven years I have been beating myself up because I lost 179 pounds and I gained most of it back saying how stupid could I have been. So mad at myself and unable to forgive myself. I don’t want to do that again. I can’t take the pressure and the looks. I had someone tell me at the store the other day “ I can’t stand looking at you” . I said excuse me what did I do. They said look at you you lost the weight. Something that I can’t do. And I said yes but you have always been thin and I have always been extremely heavy. Then I told them how I lost the weight. Even at my heaviest, I have always been happy for people when they’ve lost weight. Felt bad that I couldn’t do it but happy for them. I can’t believe this, here we go again. I cannot tell you how bad I feel and I am scared because I do not wanna throw the towel in. I have done that all my life. And now I’m supposed to start going to different restaurants when I don’t know how to count them and start eating food again ~ are you kidding me I’ll be 314 pounds in six months. If not sooner. I know my body. Why don’t they understand that. Heather I know this is very long and I don’t expect you to read it all in a podcast. You would waste too much time but I do need to know what do I do now for maintenance and how do I handle this. If the difference in calories is like say 300 cal more in maintenance do you add that all in one time or do you do 50 this week 100 next I don’t know I do not know how to do maintenance. Plus I had mentioned shortly before to you that I’m very self-conscious about all this loose skin. And tonight I was also told I have a turkey neck. People don’t realize what comes out of their mouth And how it can affect people. I am so sorry to go on and on and on. But could you somehow someway advise me what I should do and how to handle this. Thank you. I admire you so much for everything that you do and have done and that you have maintained your weight for all these years you are definitely a true success story. YOU Definitely need to be proud of yourself. Which I’m sure you are. You have worked so hard. Such an accomplishment. You deserve all the best. Thank you again.

Maybe need to gain weight purposefully?

Hi Heather, I have lost 175 lbs over a long period of time, but only since January have I been at this low weight (154, 5'8") that I've maintained for 6 months. I feel very good at this weight. However, I have a big loose skin removal surgery scheduled next month. I have a large amount of skin and subcutaneous fat, so it's possible I will lose another 10+ pounds as a result. My concern is that I'm already uncomfortable with people telling me I look "too thin". What if I end up feeling that I do want to gain back some weight after I've recovered from surgery? Would you have any advice on how to determine whether I'm doing this for myself versus in response to others' comments? And how to do this carefully and without going back into gaining too much? I may be getting ahead of myself since surgery is a month away, but I'd like to prepare the best I can. Thanks!

Does it have to be a chocolate bar?

After listening to the coaching call with Karolina, I want to follow something similar. I am very intrigued on the idea of trying something different as what I am doing (or not doing) isn't working and I am finally accepting that. My daily paper food log will have at the top "Weight Loss is not my goal. Gaining control of my health is my goal." My question is does it have to be a daily chocolate bar or should it be an item that is a current addiction food? For me personally, candy really isn't that much of a temptation, but sugary coffee drinks are! Would having a daily coffee treat be acceptable to substitute? If so, does it need to be a drink that I purchase from somewhere or can it be something I prepare at home? I have a realized that I have a massive food delivery/drive thru food addiction that I am going to work into having a meal 3x a week at first but making it a requirement to go sit down and eat at the food establishment, not from a drive thru or delivery. But I certainly don't want to make eating out a daily item. Any suggestions? Thanks.

No question … just a thank you

Hello, I can not seem to find the adequate words to express my gratitude for the community you have built and hard work in making the maintainers PDF. I am simply BLOWN away with the information in this document. I have learned so much since joining HSM 1/2021. I call myself a HSM lifer now. I use my HSM tools not only in my eating and weight management but also in my everyday life. I am simply a better human being because of HSM. Thank you.

No question … just a thank you

Hello, I can not seem to find the adequate words to express my gratitude for the community you have built and hard work in making the maintainers PDF. I am simply BLOWN away with the information in this document. I have learned so much since joining HSM 1/2021. I call myself a HSM lifer now. I use my HSM tools not only in my eating and weight management but also in my everyday life. I am simply a better human being because of HSM. Thank you.